Resiliency- Finding Your Support Squad

Finding your people who will be there for you, and support you no matter what is integral to responding with resiliency. Twelve years ago, I did not know that the date I was going on would lead to a lifelong relationship with my soul partner. I had so much resistance around relationships. Specifically, around commitment, and about finding a person that would be able to or willing to be with someone with ongoing health challenges.

"Finding your people who will be there for you, and support you no matter what is integral to responding with resiliency."

In retrospect, I see that we all have something about ourselves that feels incredibly vulnerable to share with someone especially someone that you are interested in romantically. I have found that:

  • Feeling complete within yourself and not looking for someone to complete you is setting yourself up for success. My husband and I say that we complete ourselves, but we enhance one another.
  • Compatibility is so important, because when you are with someone where your personalities, strengths, weaknesses are compatible it enhances your ability to help one another hope, cope, and deal through all your life experiences.
  • When you truly love and accept the other for who they are, and you are both committed to working on yourselves consistently this creates a relationship where you are taking responsibility for your “baggage” we all have it, and not putting it on the other person. This can transform the way you disagree with one another, create boundaries in the relationship, and foster the feeling of partnership.
  • Communication and making decisions that are of the highest good for your relationship is essential to feeling seen, heard, supported, and understood.
When this strong foundation is created, sharing your vulnerabilities and rising up to challenges together (we have had our share: cancer diagnoses (picture above was taken a month after I received chemotherapy and was still wearing a wig), treatments, surgeries, job layoffs, job changes, moves, navigating family relationships, global pandemic etc.) is what makes the relationship so special, sacred, and inspires resiliency.